Two – How To Talk To Crazy People by Donna Kakonge – Public Relations

I know, I really hate people. It’s amazing how much they talk. I don’t really understand why people are so stupid. I think either Aunt Zeddie or Darlene has a really big mouth; one of them is going around telling other people my business. Everyone thinks there is something wrong with me because I’m not married yet. It’s so silly and so stupid. People watch and judge you so much.

Why the hell should I get married?

I do not at all understand the concept of marriage here. If marriage is anything like Auntie Zeddie and Uncle Eddie’s—where a woman works outside, then does all of the work inside the home, while her husband does a little bit of work at the university, then comes home and parks his ass on the sofa to watch CNN—I am having none of it. Romantic love is not always a good thing but I lean towards it a little.

In Kampala, men walk down the streets holding hands and yet say they are not gay. Well, even if they are, it isn’t any of my business anyway. To paraphrase former Canadian Prime Minister Pierre Elliott Trudeau, the state has no place in our bedrooms.

I am amazed, thoroughly and completely amazed, at how much people gossip here. I find it completely disgusting.

Do I spend so much time talking about others? I do not.

I really can’t emphasize how much I hate people. I am furiously trying to get something done and all they do is talk and talk.

I really, really, really hate people.

Yesterday, when I went into the computer room at the Makerere library—which has only two computers for thousands of students— the head of the library, Charles, had a globe of the world that didn’t even have Uganda on it. Charles treated me politely when Alex, whom he works with, was present. But when Alex left and a white guy approached, Charles was very rude to me, very rude indeed.

Even at the Greenland Bank, when you go up to a counter to discuss your business, someone will stand right there and listen to your conversation. There is no privacy.

TThis is a very strange place.  Now,  I  know  why  so  many  things  have  been bothering me and why in so many ways I can’t stand this place. People here have big mouths. Honestly, it’s like they have nothing better to do with their time and energy. I’m just going to try and keep to myself. I like it that way. It’s better on me.

My family has often made me feel like I am their public relations representative. I  should not have to be that for anyone. It puts a lot of pressure on me.


Author: kakonged

I am an author, journalist, teacher, and lawyer who lives in Toronto, Canada. This picture is a selfie that was done on Saturday, February 24, 2018, nearing six years of my being dreadlocked.